Friday, August 23, 2013

Litter Redux

The Litter Lady (LL) would like to share with her readers this recent exchange she had with a perceptive reader (PR).

 PR: The Litter Lady will be amazed to learn that since 1974, littering has been a crime in the State of Illinois under the Litter Control Act. The Litter Lady is all too aware that the Litter Control Act suffers from a lack of enforcement. However, the Litter Lady will be cheered to learn that the minimum penalty for violating the Act is now, brace yourself, $50.

I anxiously await to hear whether the Litter Lady ascertains that this tougher sanction deters the crime of littering.

Doubtless, the Litter Lady regrets that the Litter Control Act does not reward citizens who pick up litter. Assuredly, the Litter Lady believes that the carrot works better than the stick.

LL: The Litter Lady is quite certain (as her charming walking companion surely also has noted) that the paltry sanction is NOT doing its job and that a public information campaign along with many carrots (and many rich rewards for the Litter Lady and her charming companion) are essential.

PR: The Litter Lady's charming companion wholeheartedly concurs that many rich rewards are indeed essential.

The Litter Lady wonders whether she could publicize the Litter Control Act by a well-timed citizen's arrest in plain view of the local media (and also garner the fabulous $50 fine), but on second thought, the Litter Lady prefers to deal with litter, not ruffians.

LL: One of the Litter Lady's famous sayings:

                Ruffians resist. Litter rarely does.

PR: Truer words were never uttered or inscribed. Which explains why the Litter Lady pursues litter, not ruffians. The Litter Lady is no fool.

LL: 'tis safer to pick up AFTER a ruffian than to pick up the ruffian him/herself.
PR: Indeed, safer and wiser


Anonymous said...

Dear Litter Lady,

I literally protest your illiterately calling the American diet "litter".

Rose D. Sigman

Susan Messer said...

Say what?

Anonymous said...

I hope you realize I was playing with your so well-written Post.

That's what!

Rose D. Sigman

Susan Messer said...

Ah, okay. I didn't get the part about the diet. Thanks. Play is good.